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The phone call a blogger never wants to have

Earlier this week, Lee Dresie wrote a story comparing this year's Danny Green to the Grizzlies' Tony Allen. In the next game the Spurs played, Green went off from deep. What follows is the transcript of a chimeric phone conversation set earlier this morning.

Soobum Im-USA TODAY Sports


ME:  Hello?

VOICE:  Did you watch the game Wednesday night?

ME:  Which game?

VOICE:  The Spurs game, obviously.  We beat the Pelicans.

ME:  We?  Who is this?

VOICE:  Danny Green.  Or as you called me, "Tony Allen."   You know, the guy who can't shoot.

ME:  (Sheepishly). Uh, yes, I saw the game.  Good win, DG!

DANNY GREEN:  Did you notice who shot well in the game, Mister-Pounding-the-Rock-blogger?

ME: (Trying to recover). I sure did!  My man Manu was fantastic!  5 for 6 from three.  It was great.

DG:  (Stony silence)

ME:  Danny?  DG?  You still there.

DG: (Icily). Did you notice anyone else who shot well?

ME:  (Frantically checking box score). Uh, yeah.

DG:  Who?

ME: (Even more sheepishly). Well, there were a few Tar Heel Triples.

DG:   A few?

ME:  (Just above a whisper). Uh, looks like you went 4 from 6 from three.  16 points in 18 minutes. (Trying to change the subject) Hey, did you happen to read my article comparing you to Tony Allen?

DG:  (Stony silence)

ME:  I guess you did.  I suppose I could have been a bit more positive.  I suppose I could been more clear that being compared to Tony Allen on the defensive end is high praise.  I suppose I could have mentioned that you have the highest winning percentage in NBA history (minimum 330 games) at .747.  I bet a lot of people don't know that!!

DG:  (Sarcastically). Yes, that would have been good "journalism."

ME:  I suppose you are right.  You really are one of my favorite players. You play so hard.  You were drafted in the second round, cut several times, but worked extremely hard to become a very good NBA player.  The post may have been a wee bit negative.  I'm really sorry.   I truly am.

VOICE:  (Laughter). You really fell for it.  What a fool.  Happy April Fool's Day!!

ME:  (Suspiciously) Hey, who is this really? 

VOICE:  (More laughter)

ME:   Damn, Pop, you got me again.  I can't believe I fall for this every time. At least you didn’t use that fake Argentinian accent like last year.