What does the world think when they look at Boris Diaw?

"When I look at Boris Diaw I think about Beethoven and the age of the romantics." -Bill Walton.

J.R. Wilco emailed me this You Tube clip with uber-hippie and philosopher Bill Walton fawning over Boris when he played for the Suns.  As the clip concludes, Walton made the profound statement above.

JRW's instructions to me were simple:

See below.  Start at the bottom.

Now I've only known our editor-in-chief for five months. Our first meeting was at an Outback Steakhouse on a rainy Friday night in San Marcos in late September, and we discussed writing ideas while eating coconut shrimp. We've developed an undeniable understanding of one another in that short time-frame.  We've had disagreements about punctuation and harsh exchanges via text or email over sentence structure into the wee hours of the night. I frustrate him because I double space after a period. He frustrates me when he cuts my word count. I've learned we are both strong willed and extremely passive-aggressive. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he cuts this entire paragraph, and I have to add it into the comments in order to tell this story.

That said, we usually operate on similar wavelengths. Wilco can send me a five word email and I know exactly what to do: see Boris beyond basketball. We need to see Boris in poetry, artistry and song. Just like when Beethoven shuff..shu..shuff...escorted in the age of Romanticism in music.

So enough with how the sausage gets made, let's get started on the romantic age of Boris. First, I took to Twitter to see what others think when they see the man.

@SARR_SBN soft feather pillows

— Dan McCarney (@danmccarneysaen) January 24, 2014

@SARR_SBN Roadblock from GI Joe

— Geoff Sheen (@geoffsheen760) January 24, 2014

@SARR_SBN croissants.

— Quixem Ramirez (@quixem) January 24, 2014

@SARR_SBN His close friendship with Tony Parker.

— Chris Duel (@ChrisDuel) January 24, 2014

@SARR_SBN croissants

— Paul Flannery (@Pflanns) January 24, 2014

@SARR_SBN this is what I think of when I see Boris Diaw: http://t.co/eohgnLcYW5

— Rafael Montalvo (@racmontalvo526) January 25, 2014

@SARR_SBN lol...never really thought about it....maybe MC Ren from NWA...overlooked but dude could rap...like Boris can play... Just Quietly

— Jabari Young (@jabari_young) January 25, 2014

@SARR_SBN smooth and graceful. He never forces anything or looks like he's putting a lot of effort into it, but it still works.

— Paul Garcia PS (@PaulGarciaPS) January 25, 2014

.@SARR_SBN A spark that remains only surpassed by John Lennon meeting Paul McCartney at Woolton Parish Church garden fete.

— Kelly Dwyer (@KDonhoops) January 24, 2014

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-conversation="none" lang="en"><p><a href="https://twitter.com/SARR_SBN">@SARR_SBN</a> <a href="https://twitter.com/poundingtherock">@poundingtherock</a> I should have said whirling butt cheeks.</p>&mdash; Dan McCarney (@danmccarneysaen) <a href="https://twitter.com/danmccarneysaen/statuses/427206138094817280">January 25, 2014</a></blockquote> <script async src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

As for me, I see purple.

I see an open meadow that for thousands of years has been a place of calm and serenity but now two stages have been constructed for a battle of bands that will be fought for all eternity.  On stage one Nazareth belts

Heart breaker, soul shaker
I've been told about you
Steamroller, midnight stroller
What they've been saying must be true

On stage two Kiss answers

You say you wanna go for a spin
The party's just begun, we'll let you in

The war between the two continues into perpetuity.  Each band plays only one song on a loop until the end of days.

...Now you're messin' with a...

...I... wanna rock and roll all night... and party every day...

...Now you're messin' with a...

...I... wanna rock and roll all night... and party every day...

As the battle rages a lone figure dressed in purple wanders into the meadow.  His hands are well moisturized and he carries himself with a sense of ambivalence and calm that seems completely out of place with the lyrical bombs that are lobbed over his head at ear piercing decibel levels.  He sits in the grass and slowly picks the petals from a flower and tosses them gently into the wind as the chaotic battle that is slowly destroying every molecule of decency in the world wages on.

That's what I think of when I see Boris Diaw.

*   *   *

Many thanks to those that took a few minutes out of your day to share your thoughts on Boris.

But as for Manu Ginobili, Danny Green, Matthew Tynan, Fake Coach Pop, Vanilla Ice, Senator Cory Booker, Ernie Johnson, Bill Simmons, Senator Rand Paul, David Aldridge, Mud Loving Rednecks, Chuck Woolery, The Iron Sheik, Art Mann, John Rocker, Mark Cuban, Dirk Nowitzki, Metta World Peace, Skip Bayless, Chris Broussard, Ricky Gervais, Dean Norris, Corey Feldman, Vanilla Ice, Guy Fieri, David Robinson, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Jeff McDonald, Mike Monroe, HP Basketball, Mike Prada, Don Harris, Conan O'Brien and Netw3rk I'm sorry you missed out on the opportunity to make an impact on the world by sharing your thoughts on the man that reminds millions of the age of the romantics, and bend the curve on the slow decline of civilization.

No need to apologize to me, I'm just doing my job.  But you might consider an apology to Boris Diaw. And civilization.

And Bill Walton.