clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Tony Parker is better than you*.

Now before the fawning and adulation begin, let's admit one thing to ourselves. If given the choice, there's a large part of Tony Parker that would love to play with this lineup for the rest of the regular season. With Tim and Manu sidelined, the Spurs have exactly one guy capable of creating his own shot on a regular basis. Tony could shoot the ball 50 times a night with this lineup, and I'm not sure Pop would blink. Tony enjoys this opportunity to have the show revolve around him for 40 minutes a night. There's nothing inherently wrong with that, but that love of the limelight separates the Frechman from Tim and Manu, the two anti-stars of the Spurs three star solar system.

Now let's get down to the praise and worship part of the service.

Hoe. Lee. Crap. Before we bask in the superlative nature of Tony's numbers the past two games, let's take a look at how the two opposing point guards fared.

Jason Kidd:

35 minutes
2 points
4 assists

Steve Blake:

24 minutes
0 points
1 assist

In the past two games, Tony Parker has outscored his counterparts by a total of 76 to 2. Seventy-six to two! Setenta y seis a dos! That's parents-should-pull-their-kids-from-the-YMCA-game-to-prevent-emotional-scarring levels of embarrassment right there.

In the past two games (in two nights, no less) Tony combined for:

32-59 FG
11-13 FT
76 points in 72 minutes
21 assists
10 rebounds
3 TOs

(I don't know how to transition from those numbers to words about those numbers.)

Now, as we all know, Tony Parker is whipping boy #1B here at PtR. But not today. Not in this post. This post we celebrate Frenchie McWonderbutt. We talk about his lovely smile, his cute accent and divine fashion sense. We go on and on about his improved jumper, his deadly crossover and his ability to work the 1-on-3 fast break to perfection. And we do NOT, under any circumstances, bring up any rap albums.

Now bring the love, people.

*Excludes: Approximately 25 NBA players, Santa Claus, Dwight Schrute and Tina Fey.