My good friend Rod and I had the pleasure of having front row seats (though not on the floor) when the Spurs visited Seattle. If you've ever tried taking pictures at a basketball game you know how impossible it is to keep the players in focus, let alone capture an interesting event. Thems players is crazy fast!
Luckily Rod Machen was the one taking the photos. He's a very talented amateur photographer and he captured some great shots despite never taking photos of this type before. Please enjoy them, but don't reuse them without the express written of myself, Rod and the club-footed notary named Russell who works at the Wells Fargo on 5th.
Here's a teaser, the rest are after the jump. Warning: the full post takes a while to load.
Squatch, the Sonics mascot. Taken about two seconds before he surprises (and subsequently scares the ever living crap out of) a kid sitting in the second row.
A Sonics representative apologizing to the frightened kid who evidently is not appeased. I'm thinking he is demanding free cotton candy, minimum. Probably my favorite photo of the bunch.
An unzoomed, unmagnified shot giving you an idea how close are seats were. That's Manu. Isn't he dreamy?
Form, thy name is Manu.
Manu mercilessly toys with the hapless Aaron Brown while the rest of the Sonics run the "double fist" defense, also known as "stand around and watch."
I'm going to make it to heaven, light up the sky like a flame! Fame!
Money.
Tim plays patty cake with Johan Petro while Jacque looks on with a jealous rage.
Damien Wilkins brings some weak mess into the lane while Tim looks like he just remembered he still has to do his taxes.
Tim gives the universal sign for "The opposing team is not currently defending me in an adequate fashion and thus I think it most prudent that I receive an expedited pass." Francisco finds his verbosity offensive and refuses with a Dutch-like air of superiority.
Nick Collison flits, floats and arabesques his way in a most futile fashion.
Elson interrupts Luke Ridnour's leisurely Sunday stroll with an offensive rebound.
Tony gets up on his tip-toes to appear as tall as Rashard Lewis.
Where exactly is Tony's defender in this picture?
Bruce Bowen, doing his best to pretend he isn't disappointed that Nancy-boy Allen sat this one out.
Matt Bonner doing what Matt Bonner does.
How to yank down a rebound, by Chris Wilcox. His nickname is Weezie, you know. Weezie.
Two Slovenians, one Frenchman and a Sengalese. NBA garbage time, it's faaannnnntastic!
And now for a look at the type of people who have floor seats to a Sonics game.
The most normal looking fellow we saw all night. And he's wearing a shirt with wallpaper on it.
Hip glasses? Check. Acceptably small digital camera? Yessir. Blackberry? Of course. Pearl earrings? Certainly. Weird sweater/wrap hybrid made of endangered goat species? Uh-huh. Preposterously large diamond engagement ring? Naturally. But what's with the shoes?
Ah, it's the leader of the Douchebag Gang. Just look at this guy. Sunglasses... indoors... in April in Seattle. This guy was wearing enough cologne to tranquilize a wildebeest.
This guy brought douchebaggery to a level I thought unattainable. The jeans with white shirt and quasi sports coat were topped nicely with a "Krew" cap, which apparently is some hip skate boarding apparel company. Like this guys ever touched a skateboard. The best part about that jacket? The collar comes pre-frayed! Is he serious? Who mates with someone like this? And the dog tags? Come on. Have some self-respect. After seeing this guy for the first time I told Rod, in all seriousness, "If I ever dress like that please kick me in the nuts as hard as you can." Maybe I'm a judgmental, self-righteous asshole, but I don't think I'm out of line when I say it would be best for all humanity if this guy was neutered. Spay him too while you're at it. You can never be too careful.