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Tony Parker Gets Paid to Wear Flip Flops in the Shower

As the editor of a Spurs blog, I get the occasional email containing information or a link "that would interest you and your readers." The vast majority of the time it's from another blog looking for some extra hits. But Friday's email was one of the rare instances when I'm sent something that blows me away; something so dumbfounding, so flabbergasting, that it makes me wonder if I'm the only person blogger on the planet who knows. How the hell is everyone not talking about this?

Hi, Matthew. I'm writing on behalf of Lamisil. We're letting people know about a new site for basketball fans featuring Mike & Mike and Tony Parker.

Charles Dickens would struggle to come up with a better email intro. And the website... oh, the website. I don't even know where to begin. Let's just start with the facts.

Lamisil is introducing a new gel that treats athletes' foot, jock itch, etc. The advertising campaign and slogan? Get your game feet on. I got nothing. Sorry. It's the perfect combination of absurdity and out-of-touchness. I have a feeling the person who came up with that can count toothpicks with frightening speed.

There's some contest you can enter where the winner spends a day in New York City with the athlete spokesperson. The athlete spokesperson is Tony Parker. Tony. Parker. The same guy who's engaged to Hollywood It Girl and actress Eva Longoria. The same guy who recently released a debut rap album. The same guy who's French. There's no way he talked this over with Eva, right? And if he did, when she noted that he'd be representing a medicine associated with stanky-ass feet did he defend himself by noting the additional association with sweaty, damp, itchy crotch-rot? What's next, Valtrex?

God, there's a million other jokes here. I feel like I've been given one of those word puzzles where you have to make as many words as you can out of the letters obtained in the given word, and the given word is trans-2-methylcyclohexanol. And plurals count, too. It's too much for this one humble blogger to handle, so I leave it to the rest of the bloggosphere to fill in the rest.

The best part? The person who contacted me is sending me a media kit. "The same materials being sent out to NBA trainers in the marketing initiative around this product." I feel like every word I've blogged, since the beginning, is validated with this offering. I wish I was kidding. And oh yes, there will be pictures; I will share in the spoils of this victory.

Lastly, my high score on the online "Hoop Shot Game" is 41. I challenge all PtR members to beat it. Screen shots will be required as proof.