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Game 14 Open Thread: Los Angeles Lakers @ SA

[Update 1: I added a relevant link in the paragraph about Kobe. Thanks to massive boisson for the heads up.]

[Update 2: ForumBlueAndGold.com is a great Laker blog. Check it out.]

Starting lineups:

LA (5-7, 2-3 away)
PG Smush Parker
SG Kobe Bryant
SF Lamar Odom
PF Kwame Brown
C Chris Mihm

SA (10-3, 5-1 home)
PG Tony Parker
SG Manu Ginobili
SF Bruce Bowen
PF Tim Duncan
C Rasho Nesterovic

The effing Lakers come to town tonight. As you probably know, Kobe is hoisting 29.1 FGA per game which accounts for 36% of the team's total. That's outrageous. But, then again, who the hell else is going to shoot the ball? In fact, take a look at their roster... how many of those guys would even get into the Spurs rotation? Kobe and Odom. That's the list.

Phil Jackson, apparently choosing money over the preservation of his partially-deserved legacy, is back coaching the Lakers. I hate that Zen-talking sunuvabitch. You may have noticed I tend to dislike players who I deem overrated; well the same goes for coaches. I'm an equal-opportunity hater. I'm not saying anything that hasn't been said countless times, but DAMN, a loosely coagulated lump of whale sperm could have led those Bulls teams to titles.

Loosely Coagulated Lump of Whale Sperm: "Alright Mike. Here's what I need you to do. Wait a second... You're the most skilled player of all time and also one of the most motivated. Just do what you do."

Jordan: "You're nothing without me. I made you."

Loosely Coagulated Lump of Whale Sperm: "Actually Mike a large whale penis made me, but I get your point. Scottie, I need you to stay out of Mike's way, play killer defense, run the break and grab some boards. And slap some people around with those amazing hands of yours."

Pippen: "They are a sight to behold, aren't they? You know what they say about a man wi-"

Loosely Coagulated Lump of Whale Sperm: "Pip. I CAME FROM A WHALE. It was, like, bigger than your whole body. Rodman: show up, rebound and don't kill anybody on our off days. Well, maybe off the occasional crack whore, but that's IT. Everybody else: play defense and make the open shots and layups that MJ and Pip create for you. And visualize success or something. Zen. Buddha. Nepal. I chi. Whatever. Now somebody get me a moist towelette."

Phil Jackson's career record is 832-316, a 72.5% winning percentage. Pop's is 396-210, a 65.3% WP. Let's assume SA wins 60 games this year; that leaves Pop at 66.3%. The Lakers are currently 5-7. So if the Lakers lose 104 consecutive games Pop will have a better WP% than Phil! Damn. I thought it would be closer than that.

Here's what Matty da Blade has to say about tonight's matchup:

I was going to send an e-mail saying that I'll take the Spurs -(anything less than 10.5)....then I looked at the line...it is the Spurs -13 and the total is 186.

This is a tough call. By all means, the Spurs should win this game by 30. They played poorly last time out. They have had plenty of rest. They are playing against a weak LA team with a 2-3 record on the road. Plus, LA is coming off a 5 game homestand spread over two weeks (talk about favorable). I believe they are susceptible to mailing in their first road game in a fortnight.

However, having said that, 13 points is a lot. An awful lot in an NBA game.

So, I am torn...logic and reason says Spurs...risk aversion says Lakers...emotion says Spurs...

....therefore, da blade does not recommend a play on this game....but for entertainment value I'll take the Spurs and the under.

Tonight's line: SA -13
Tonight's total: 186
My pick: SA
Matty da Blade's plays: SA | Under
The Spurs are 6-7 ATS this year. I am a 3-10. Da Blade is 8-4-1 ATS | 2-3 TOT.

This is an open thread. Commenters will receive a free spoon. Wait! There's more. If you promise to tell a friend about my blog I will send you another spoon free of charge. Two spoons people! One for each hand!