Manu in a Dress, Timmy in a Wig

I went to the annual Tux & Tennies event on February 2nd and I thought I'd write a little recap of the event.  

Lots of great Spurs stuff up for auction... including signed jerseys, sneakers and blown-up photos of our Spurs in various highlight moments of their careers.  The big four (Tim, Tony, Manu & Bruce) posing after last year's championship... Manu shirtless after winning Olympic gold... Tim & David after winning Championship #2.  

Also up for auction were signed jersey's and sneakers from other NBA stars, including Steve Nash, Lebron James, Dirk Nowitzki, etc.

The big auction prize of the night was a 2008 Cadillac Escalade.  The other big auctions of note, were dinner for 3 couples with Manu Ginobili @ Morton's Steakhouse and dinner for 3 couples with Tony Parker @ Bistro Vatel... And a paintball party for 10 with Tim Duncan.  Nice prizes, huh?

The highlight of the night was a spoof of the Tony Awards... It was fucking hilarious... anyone who says our guys are boring needs to check out these videos.  At this time, the Manu Ginobili/Fabricio Oberto piece is not on Youtube, but I hope someone will post it soon... it's totally awesome.

The "awards" were hosted by Brent Barry & Tony Parker.  I'm not sure about the order of each award, but I think it went like this...

Tony & Brent "walking" in front of all these San Antonio back-drops.... restraunts, theatres and buildings... I think including the Alamo.  Then the awards start...

*  Robert Horry winning for best Spur in an opening sequence.  His spoof was the Hills are Alive from the Sound of Music.  Think of the grand aerial opening sequence then swoop down to show Robert in a blonde wig with a blue dress w/apron (aka Julie Andrews) and white hi-tops. After the video, Robert walked to the podium to accept his award from Tony and his speech consisted of "Thank You".  Then Tony cuts away to Brent Barry who is backstage ready to interview Robert on his performance. Brent asked him how he prepared for his role and Robert says he's a veteran and he has alot of experience to draw from and it's just a part of his routine.  Too funny.

*  Next I think was Matt Bonner as Annie singing Tomorrow.  The opening scene starts with the camera fixed on these black hi-tops then moves upward past the hairy legs to the red/white/black dress of Annie/Matt.  He has a beard and the Coyote plays "Sandy".  His acceptance speech was kinda long and rambling and he thanked his whole family.

* I think after Matt was was a scene from the Jersey Boys starring Tim Duncan.  The award was for "Best Male Lead Performance by a Virgin Islander who performed better than the other islanders in the best Male Lead Performance".  Tim was wearing this horrendous wig that made him look like the love child of James Brown & Little Richard... but taller.  He was singing Sherry Baby, with back-up singers Brent Barry, Sean Elliot and the Coyote.  They were wearing these cheesy suits with red ties and silver lapels. Tim did a really great job with the microphone.  Tim's acceptance speech was funny, too.  He comes up to the podium and starts to say... "I'd like to thank..." then the music starts to drown him out (like a real awards show) and he says "but Matt Bonner used all the time".  He took his award and walked off the podium... too friggin funny.  

* Francisco Elson has his turn next with his rendition of the Phantom of the Opera.  He used his face mask and I think white-out or tape to cover one part of the mask.  He was wearing a black cape and there was a ton of smoke surrounding him as he sang The Music of the Night.  When he came up to accept his award, he kinda mumbled his acceptance speech and Brent made a crack about a Dutch Berlitz tape in his past/future?

* One of the funniest moments was up next.  I don't remember what the award was called but it featured Manu Ginobili as Eva Peron in Evita.  If you've ever seen the movie, it's the famous scene where Eva is singing before her people from a balcony.  The bit shows the Argentine people looking upward (including a shot of Antonio Banderas) and Eva on a balcony singing with Juan Peron (Fabricio Oberto) standing behind her.  Picture this, Manu Ginobili in what looks like a strapless prom dress with jewels around his neck and wrists and singing "Don't cry for me Argentina".  Oh, and did I mention the blonde bun wig?  At the end of the song, Manu/Evita lays his head on Juan/Fab's shoulder.  Totally hilarious.

* Manu and Fabricio come up to accept their award and Manu says "I'd like to thank Brent Barry for the most embarassing moment of my whole life".  He also thanks his "husband", Fabricio.

I could not find a copy of this video anywhere, but I'm hoping someone will post on Youtube soon.

*  Then we go to Bruce Bowen and his award for "Best Musical to use as your excuse for off Season Training".  That brings us to the Flashdance number, yup you read that correctly.  It's the dance number with the opening scene of Jennifer Beal's taped foot & toes... except it's not JB... it's Bruce's feet.  And then he's dancing in a long dark wig with a headband to the music of Maniac.  I think you can hear one woman on the video say he looks like Rick James... I think she may be right.

When Bruce accepts his award, he says he wants to especially thank his wife for the help with his wardrobe.  I do believe he was being sarcastic.

The last segment is Tony Parker & Eva Longoria doing a piece from Grease... "Summer Nights", with the T-Birds... Finley, Ime & JV.  Eva has a blonde "Sandy" wig and it looks like Tony borrowed the wig from Tim for his segment... it's pretty ugly.  And I think I overheard someone say that Brent's wife is playing Rizzo in this piece... she's cute all dressed in black.  The bleacher scene is hilarious and then Tony & Eva end by singing to each other.

The end of the video shows the outtakes from all the different shoots.  One shows Francisco hacking at all the smoke during his shoot.  Another shows Ginobili getting the top of his dress stuffed with padding for his bustline.  

When the "show" ends, Tony & Brent are telling the audience to enjoy the rest of the evening when Pop walks up to the podium.  Brent says this isn't planned.  With his usual delivery, Pop says something to the effect of... I'm glad you're  both comfortable in doing this with the trade deadline on February 21st approaching.  He also says that he's glad to know where the focus of the team has been for the last month. Aahh, Pop being his usual crumudgeon self.  Everyone laughs and Brent re-iterates this is the first and last production of the Tony awards.

I personally hope not, because this was the best tux & tennies event I've ever attended.  I really enjoyed seeing our guys showing off their sense of humor.  I hope the Spurs someday release the full video from start to end... it was priceless.