Ryan Richards Redonkulous Potential!!! Thread
So while everybody slobbers over the great James "Mr." Anderson, I decided to pull up the trusty search engine and try to give a little attention to our second round pick, Ryan Richards, who some of my sources saw crying in a little corner of Madison Square Garden right after everyone else left the building.
What do we make of this pick? You can't really go with the glass half-full/half-empty approach because that's saying he's a lock to stay in the league, whether as a star, a role player, an end-of-bench reserve or a practice dummy. No, I'm gonna go look at him with a glass completely full or completely empty approach -- either Ryan "English" Richards can be a super duper star as a Dirk Nowitzki-Dwight Howard hybrid and becomes a trailblazer of some sort for basketball to replace football ("soccer") as the national sport in the UK, OR someone who won't even step foot in the L and probably go back overseas dunking on hapless short people, playing bagpipes while wearing a kilt embroidered with "I <3 Spurs" just between the butt crack and the tailbone. Only those two things, nothing more, nothing less.
And I'm feeling the former. Lemme explain.
Set to loop in Ryan's iPod during the draft.
I called this post the "Ryan Richards Redonkulous Potential" thread (the "!!!" was for effect, obviously), but I could've used "upside" or maybe "promise" or perhaps "motor" or "length" in honor of Jay Bilas. Using upside is quite dangerous, see, because you're also saying that there's a downside, and we, the definitively biased Spurs fans, don't want to see that in whatever draftees RC Buford chooses. He's RC Buford, dammit, unless you wanna get your behind kicked:
Reporter: So... RC, what about that Tony Parker for the Nets' Devin Harris and the 3rd pick rumors that have been going around the internet, specifically from this awesome site called 'Pounding The Rock'?
RC Buford: Excuse me, do I know you?
Reporter: No, but I have a press pass and have been following the NBA for years on my laptop.
RC: What's your name?
Reporter: Augustus Fink-Nottle from New Hampshire.
RC: You decided we had to let one of our all-stars go in exchange for a player who only competes on an every-other-day basis and the 2nd coming of Kwame Brown?
Reporter: No sir, I was just asking to confirm if the rumors were tr---
RC: Okay, we'll trade him.
Reporter: (in shock) Wow... really? No, I mean... I was just kidding!
RC: Nah, you're a genius so we'll do it. Deal done, probably have it approved by Stern later and then we'll have to ship out Tony in a private jet stuffed with baguettes in the next 24 hours.
Reporter: Cool... I could totally be a GM, then?
RC: Yes, because obviously I'm not doing my job and I don't even know that Tony Parker's an NBA champion 3 times over and a Finals MVP who can dominate Derek Fisher. And I can't tell how many fingers I have from the number of my toes.
Reporter: You're messing me with me.
RC: Yes I am so GTFO.
![]()
Pop approves of RC's reporter smackdown.
Think about your breakfast eggs. The "potential" of that egg can be pretty immense -- it can achieve the perfect sunny side up shape, have a soft, juicy yolk in the middle along with the sides burnt to a magnificent crisp. The egg has the potential to be all of that. If it doesn't come out like that, heck, it's still an egg and tastes like any other egg in the world, right? No disappointment in life, we all move on and the egg eventually gets digested in your system and returns to the earth a few hours later. That, my friends, is the power of potential. And I believe in Ryan Richards' ability to achieve that and not be the usual discarded egg.
Don't believe me? Let me count the ways to enlightenment.
#1: Ryan Richards is a young stud.
Richards, a bouncing 15-year old back then, was the youngest player to ever play in the Nike Hoop Summit, an all-star game pitting the best of USA junior basketball against the top junior international prospects. He played with some interesting teammates at that time which included Omri Casspi, Solomon Alabi, Nic Batum, Petteri Koponen and the great Alexis Ajinca.
Unfortunately, he only logged in 3 minutes but heck, even another RR -- Ricky Rubio -- couldn't crack this meeting when he was 15. Major props to the Spurs' RR.
#2: Ryan Richards' initials are RR.
Speaking of RR, Richards is capable of replacing the team's other RR: the Red Rocket, Matt Bonner. I mean, Bonner's shoes aren't actually hard to replace, and I bet anyone on PtR can replace his contributions. Good thing for Ryan is that he's as tall as Matty and can probably stroke it from the outside as well as Ginger, too.
But the comparisons end there. While Bonner's flaming head of hair can never be replaced ever, Ryan can handle the basketball pretty well and can put an end to the many times Spurs nation drew collective gasps whenever Matt put the ball on the floor and did any of the following: 1) throw up a shyhook; 2) lose control of the rock and turn it over; 3) get stripped by a guard and turn it over; and 4) throw up a shyhook, miss and the NBA statistician records it as a turnover anyway because heck, he's Matt Bonner! Everything he does is the equivalent of a turnover! [this portion sponsored by FARS(TM)]

Re-sign or not, you're still Ginger to us, Matty!
Defensively, Bonner might be better now, but Ryan's ath-uh-leticism guarantees that he will at least achieve Bonner's maximum defensive efficiency while spending at least half the effort. Richards can probably challenge Matt to a foot race, give Bonner a 1 mile headstart, throw down 50 dunks before starting and still finish a full 3 miles ahead! Wow, what an absolute steal.
#3: Ryan Richards played in Switzerland
Here's Yahoo! Sports' take on the Big Englishman:
"Seven-foot English center Ryan Richards couldn't get on the floor for his Spanish team so it had to loan him to a team in Switzerland? Well, that can't be a great sign. "He's not Patrick Ewing but he's not Patrick O'Bryant," Fran Fraschilla says. Somewhere members of the Golden State front office are cringing." -- Jeff Eisenberg

Scarf win.
You hear that, Jeff Eisenberg? Ryan Richards is a super-secret project by the British Secret Service sent to Switzerland to have his body parts replaced with steel and highly efficient gears in hopes of ending English futility in global sports! (not a replacement for James Bond, fool... Daniel Craig's already kicking arse!) I didn't want to reveal the secret but see what you've done! I will probably get shot a few minutes after posting this, but I will die peacefully knowing that Ryan Richards will save the Spurs franchise and that a young Dame Judi Dench is in a cryogenic state while her clone moves about claiming acting awards.

Last shot of Ryan Richards taken before skin grafts.
#4: Ryan Richards carries the hopes and dreams of an entire nation.
Yes, he is the Wayne Rooney and Andy Murray of pro basketball, not some dude named Joel Freeland who got drafted in 2006 but is ironically still imprisoned in Europe. If he doesn't pan out, it doesn't matter since England's used to losing a lot anyway. Zing.
Plus, what are the chances that The Queen herself flies all the way to San Antonio to catch Ryan play and win the NBA championship? How cool is that?

The Royal Queen in America? You bet.
I also can't imagine the potential (!) impact an English player on the squad will have on our lexicon. jollyrogerwilco will go nuts. I mean, a lot of people use "arse" and "crikey" already, but what about British words like "give it welly" (translation: try harder)? You can just hear Pop and Ryan having a shouting match in the heat of an intense garbage time game:
Ryan: But Coarch, I'm giving it me welly!
Pop: That's it, I quit! Get me outta here!
#5: Ryan Richards has 8.0 percent body fat.
Other famous athletes who have 8.0 percent body fat:
Charles Barkley (pre-NBA draft)
Tractor Traylor (but shorter than Ryan in height)
Oliver Miller (after a major hangover)
Kevin James (of The King of Queens and Paul Blart: Mall Cop fame)
Ted Theodore Logan (Wild Stallions? Excellent!)
Stu Jackson, NBA VP of Basketball Ops
Mischa Barton (non-bulimic version)
Phil Jackson (when not seated on his special paraplegic's chair)
Jackie Butler (pre-Mexican food binge in Texas)
#6: Ryan Richards is as easy to pronounce as "Ryan Richards"
Which makes him uber fan friendly and a potential (there's that word again, momma!) Hollywood B-lister that can snag someone as crazy hot as ScarJo.
Unlike some incredibly hard to pronounce and supposedly better foreign players:
Sofoklis Schortsanitis
Donatas Motiejunas
Miroslav Raduljca
Ian Mahinmi
Xavier "Zha-vee-ay" Henry
Pops Mensah-Bonsu
Detlef Schrempf
DJ Mbenga
Theodorus Papaloukas
Mengke Bateer
Emanuel Ginobili (just kidding)
Kevin "Ke-veen" Seraphin
Ioannis Bourousis
Gregg Popovich
(author's note: Tibor Pleiss omitted for reasons that are too awesome)

#7: Last but not the least, Ryan Richards is, as SLAM succintly puts it, an International Man of Mystery.
No intended Austin Powers reference there, but that's what makes him so intriguing. He played for a league that not a lot of people know, which could be a red flag but could also turn out to be one of the last bastions of basketball left untouched by team scouts and Draft Express.
He is also the unwilling victim of approximately 7,000 other Ryan Richards in the world after a quick Google search, which adds even more to his shroud of mystery. Think about it. What if a first-time fan googles Ryan's name and discovers that he is an astute wedding photographer? The drummer of a band with an awesome name? A club DJ? A professor with a PhD in Inorganic Chemistry? The possibilities for blackmail assuming different disguises are most excellent. I think I would like to hang out with him someday.
Richards likes to watch Dirk, Chris Bosh, Lamar Odom and... drumroll please... Rasheed Wallace! I mean, what's the over/under of Ryan Richards having some sort of crazy-mean streak like 'Sheed? What are the chances that he'll have a lowpost game as good as 'Sheed? What are the chances that, despite his skills on the low-block, he'll prefer to hang out at the three-point line like 'Sheed? What is the probability that he'll show up to Summer League camp terribly out of shape and then turn it on when the Spurs Summer League team reaches the Intergalactic Summer League Finals of the Universe? Oh my god I think I just peed in my pants thinking all about this potential.

Even if he's out of the league, there will always be a need for 'Sheed. Retire In Peace, brotha.
There you have it. If you aren't convinced yet, then I'm not sure how else I can sell this pick. Maybe we should just get back to salivating over James Anderson or resume praying that Tiago finally comes over this summer.
For some actually informative links on Richards:
Eurohopes: Basketball Prospects
And now back to your regular offseason programming.
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Comments
He’s just another average joe who can score a hot chick in a reality TV show, at best.
Paul Davis?BTW how the hell is he a millionaire?I mean LAC really pays him millions?Anyways his not in the NBA anymore.
For Sale:Anyone interested with Spurs SF Richard Jefferson? Then just pick up your phone and dial 781-452-0659.Oh,wait its the rejection hot line.(Just joking,we're stuck with him,let's deal with it that we got no other SF and I guess he is much better than what he is showing us.)
Um… yeah, about that. Lemme get back to you in a bit :)
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 26, 2010 12:48 PM CDT up reply actions
Maybe Davis should also start a game about the free agency, who is going where.
For Sale:Anyone interested with Spurs SF Richard Jefferson? Then just pick up your phone and dial 781-452-0659.Oh,wait its the rejection hot line.(Just joking,we're stuck with him,let's deal with it that we got no other SF and I guess he is much better than what he is showing us.)
There are hundreds of sportswriters devoting their summer to Lebron… I’d rather not have to think about it.
by DrumsInTheDeep on Jun 27, 2010 8:36 PM CDT up reply actions
Great, I am now always going to think of Richards as a Wodehouse character. If he comes over and sees playing time, I may feel compelled to recap games from his perspective.
“I always thought myself a bit of a prodigy at the old rebounding game, don’t you know. I mean to say, when a chap’s 6’10” and athletic he can expect a few bounces to come his way, what? Now there’s this Blair fellow, however – big bloke, built rather along the lines of … what’s his name, the Greek chap, went around slaying lions and bunging rivers about and so forth. Anyhow, as I say, Mr. Blair struck me as the last person I’d be likely to meet in the upper stratosphere competing for a carom – but I’ll be blowed if he hasn’t been coming down on missed shots like the wolf on the bally fold! Nearly took my arm off, to boot! Not on, not on at all."
by Rand on Jun 26, 2010 9:51 AM CDT up reply actions 11 recs
I kowtow to your Wodehouse-ness, Rand.
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 26, 2010 12:47 PM CDT up reply actions
From BallinEurope:
In response to the Lakers dominant big men and the aging Tim Duncan, the Spurs pick up the Brit here to create the foundation of a future frontcourt featuring Richards and Tiago Splitter.
In BiE’s opinion, Richards to the Spurs is just a terrible, terrible pick. Why? Because i’m not a Spurs fan! Damn if that clever San Antonio front office hasn’t done it again; seems this franchise is going to be around for a long, long time to come…
"Deep down we all know that swagger comes hand in hand with insecurity. We strut not to convince competitors of our dominance; we strut to convince ourselves."
Matthew Powell
hey Tim C. on the yahoo team report it said it looks like we will add tiago
It appears the Spurs will add 6-foot-11 Tiago Splitter to the roster next season. The team’s first-round pick in 2007 led Caja Laboral to the ACB (Spanish League) championship. During the ceremony to celebrate the championship, the team’s president said it is his understanding that it is Splitter’s “intent and desire” to play in the NBA next season. Splitter, 25, was voted the league’s MVP.
REAL SOVIET DAMAGE!!!!!
by SouthTexasTitan on Jun 26, 2010 12:13 PM CDT reply actions
Already seeing assumptions about RR’s “athleticism”, but his vertical jump is about 4 inches lower than the “other” RR’s. He’s got a crossover that Bonner can only dream about, though. Always love to see that in a big.
I voted “specialty player” but I’m hoping for that “all-star” thing.
by titansfan4ever on Jun 26, 2010 12:54 PM CDT reply actions
I would love to see a twin towers deal with him and Splitter with Blair ripping arms off the bench
"I've got Tim (Duncan) and you don't. That's the difference." -Gregg Popovich
I didn’t even know the bench had arms.
by doggydogworld on Jun 26, 2010 8:03 PM CDT up reply actions
Davis no match for Spurs Front Office
Davis you are way off the mark. If the Spurs didn’t see something they liked in RR they would never have drafted. I have watched him play and was greatly impressed. At the Chicago combine he also had a lot of scouts and coaches saying, “Who the hell is this guy and where did he come from?” At an honest 6 foot,10 and a half inches in his sox Richards shows a lot of skills. He hasn’t developed the muscle power of a true NBA big but remember he is just 19. He not only bulk in in the SPURS weight room, but at his age had could easily grow and inch or two and be a bonifide 7 footer. Hmmmm!!! I watched him lead a fast break up the middle, dribble behind his back and make a slick pass to a wing player. Never happen with Mahinmi, McDyess or even Blair. He has good shooting mechanics from the outside and could be the Spurs second southpaw. His handles are very good for a power forward. He needs help on his post up footwork and moves, but that can be taught. I like the looks of San Antonio’s new roster: Duncan, Parker, Ginobli, McDyess, Jefferson, Hill, Blair, Anderson and hopefully Splitter. That leaves Hairston, Gee, Temple and Richards looking to fill out the roster. I’m assuming the Spurs are not going to sign any of their free agents. The Spurs will probably send Richards to the Toros to teach him the system and sharpen his skills both defensively and offensively, but don’t be surprised if he’s called up mid-season. There are a ton of good free agents out there this year, but I don’t see the Spurs taking that route unless there is a “can’t miss” deal like the Jefferson one we got burned on last year. The summer league games should be very interesting too. All of you nay sayers will get the message about RR then.
Yep… I think I just saw RC giving me the eye, sort of like telling me, “Don’t ever, ever put Ryan Richards and Rasheed Wallace in the same sentence, you ignorant buck.”
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 26, 2010 8:41 PM CDT up reply actions
Just read
on hoops hype that Ryan Richards European team is going to send him to another league to play for. So maybe our boys might not buy out his contract if they are already making plans to loan him out.
One thing i can do...................is FINGER ROLL.
In all honest
I have been more excited about him than Anderson. I was excited about Anderson and still am, but there is that something about Ryan Richards. Maybe its the fact, that he is a seven footer that talks with a british accent. It intrigues me to no end.
LOL!
What intrigues me about the guy is he is almost seven feet tall, can shoot and likes to play physical but nobody really knows who the hell he is. Usually guys like him, especially foreign guys like him at his age get all types of hype around draft time. I hope we buy out his deal and put him in the D-league to work on his game and familiarity with our system
One thing i can do...................is FINGER ROLL.
by gunnin' gervin on Jun 26, 2010 8:00 PM CDT up reply actions
Good thing for Ryan is that he’s as tall as Matty and can probably stroke it from the outside as well as Ginger, too.

"We'll see how our character is," guard Tony Parker said. "We don't have time to be sad. Nobody cares. It's just us. We're the only ones who can help each other."
by Josh Guyer (completely deck) on Jun 26, 2010 7:58 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Wild
LOL!
One thing i can do...................is FINGER ROLL.
by gunnin' gervin on Jun 26, 2010 8:01 PM CDT up reply actions
Nice. I remember this episode… what a disaster of a dinner.
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 26, 2010 8:41 PM CDT up reply actions
I finally replied to an older post of yours, here.
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
Replied! Or should I have replied here instead?
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 28, 2010 6:52 PM CDT up reply actions
Ladies and Gentlemen, we’re in the presence of an artiste in his prime.
Treasure these days, my friends.
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
REALLY!!…..I think he should change his handle to “completely deck-ed out”.
by titansfan4ever on Jun 28, 2010 9:37 AM CDT up reply actions
Crying Ryan Richards
The reason RR was crying after the draft was for the joy of being selected by the Spurs. You have got to realize that among those that are interested in the NBA game in the UK, the Spurs are the favorite. Why??? The Spurs are a proud, but humble team. They don’t go around thumping their chests after dunking the ball and they don’t brag on themselves as do many other NBA players. To get a chance to play for the smartest team in the NBA, with such a great organization, was probably the answer to RR’s prayers. Richrds is a humble, but hungry player and he will listen to Pop and his staff intently and do his very best to carry out their instructions. He’ll be soaking it up like a sponge and probably will develop into a pretty good player. He loves the game, has size and a bit of speed and only needs to learn the system and mature physically to eventually become an even more valuable player that Splitter…and that’s saying something.
maybe he thought he was drafted by the Tottenham Spurs.
Yo, I’m 6-11, but I just want to dribble through my legs and shoot jumpshots like a guard. - Marc Blucas on Tim Duncan
hey..i was gonna say this…you..
Sparking!!!
by sparking!!! on Jun 26, 2010 11:36 PM CDT up reply actions
Great job, Davis.
Intergalactic Summer League Finals of the Universe
JTU
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
this one is great
"We'll see how our character is," guard Tony Parker said. "We don't have time to be sad. Nobody cares. It's just us. We're the only ones who can help each other."
by Josh Guyer (completely deck) on Jun 26, 2010 11:27 PM CDT up reply actions
The guy has some talent but what scares me about him is the minutes he received against big time talent. I was reading on Draftexpress.com that he did do a good job defensively against one of the better young big dudes in Europe by the name of Dejan Musli. But other than that it looks like he was playing scrubs who were to short or slow to guard him. What i did see with him is he can shoot really well and he has some handles which is really nice. I like the kid and i hope he plays on the summer league team.
One thing i can do...................is FINGER ROLL.
by gunnin' gervin on Jun 26, 2010 10:14 PM CDT reply actions
? to all you Spurs fans.
How many of you got banned by Bright side of the Sun during your series with them?
Somebody step up! - Mike Rice
None of our regulars were booted that I know of.
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
Wow
Blazer fans were booted in mass. I am on every SBNation site & have never had a problem but I think part of it might be that Seth was overwhelmed by the volume of Blazer fans. BEdge is huge.
Somebody step up! - Mike Rice
Signing Splitter and Richards will mean we should be saying goodbye to Mahinmi. There is no way Yawn gets the minutes he’s asking for when we’re bringing in Splitter and someone that basically seems like an upgraded project player in Richards. If Richards can hit NBA 3s and also develop more post moves, we may just have a young Rasheed Wallace minus the Ts. And yes, I know we shouldn’t expect anywhere near that much talent, but we don’t need another all-star PF just yet.
"I like the fact that he’s a man." – Hubie Brown on DeJuan Blair
by Manu ex Machina on Jun 28, 2010 2:47 PM CDT reply actions
I’ll add that resigning Bonner could be a bit of a tough decision. We might only keep Bonner as an old pair of shoes that we aren’t ready to throw out. We’ve gotten some good use out of him and Pop is so comfortable with him being out there on the court, but he has more than enough holes in his game. I think that the only way we keep Mahinmi is if we drop Bonner and let Richards and him fight for Bonner’s few minutes. I think Richards would end up winning in that battle, so maybe we end up trading Mahinmi away before the season ends like we did with Ratliff.
"I like the fact that he’s a man." – Hubie Brown on DeJuan Blair
by Manu ex Machina on Jun 28, 2010 3:32 PM CDT up reply actions
Richards is two years away from “fighting for minutes”.
by doggydogworld on Jun 28, 2010 3:42 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
Not
if he proves other wise! Which would be a great problem to have for the Spurs coaching staff.
One thing i can do...................is FINGER ROLL.
by gunnin' gervin on Jun 28, 2010 9:59 PM CDT up reply actions
Maybe not so much when he’s fighting against Mahinmi. He certainly seems like he has more potential than Mahinmi, and he should be able to make faster progress, barring any unfortunate injuries like Mahinmi had to deal with. Plus, he should be fine if he manages not to average 7 fouls per 36 minutes.
"I like the fact that he’s a man." – Hubie Brown on DeJuan Blair
by Manu ex Machina on Jun 28, 2010 10:38 PM CDT up reply actions
Richards’ is the new Mahinmi, except D-League eligible. That’s a big deal. Ian is in a bad spot — not good enough to earn playing time but not able to develop without it.
by doggydogworld on Jun 29, 2010 1:33 PM CDT up reply actions
Couldn’t agree more.
Also, Yawn’s contract wasn’t renewed heading into the Summer League last year. Which leaves him quite out in the cold. Too bad.
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
Caja Laboral needs a center since Tiago is leaving (hopefully) and I think Ian could be really effective there or at least more effective than he was here since he won’t get called for as many fouls as he would here. Some of the NBA foul calls are just ridiculous.
"I've got Tim (Duncan) and you don't. That's the difference." -Gregg Popovich
Please don’t get me started. I could write a novella about that play.
Be careful; apparently I'm unrelenting in my bonhomie.
You know what surprises me? The fact that 600+ people voted in the freaking poll.
Just cause we're crippled, don't mean we gotta take the crumbs.
by silverandblack_davis on Jun 28, 2010 10:30 PM CDT reply actions

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